Saturday 15 March 2014

MISS YOU SO MUCH

I dont know when your existence have become dependent..
Asking myself when will I just shatter completely when I was not talking to someone I used to talk to everyday.. I still remember we named each other many different name..When I was really no mood, you will explain what I'm piss off about to comfort me.. But I think Im really get too over already.. Keep stoling your time.. And one day I dont know what I've said and feel like you're getting away from me.. And you never chat with me the next day..

My heart isnt strong enough for this.. I try my best not to show emotion but inside my soul is being eaten away. Just because Im used to it, doesnt mean it doesnt hurt anymore. :'(
Im becoming crueller by the minute and I dont intend to do a damn thing about it..

I'm sorry if I say I need ya but I dont care
Im scared of love cause when Im not with you Im weaker
Is that so wrong, is it so wrong that you make me STRONG.




One of the things I've come to love about life is that it's never just one thing.
At times we are filled with joy, boredom or loss and despair.
All of these emotions make up the fabric of our lives.
We cannot control everything but we can control how we allow these varied moments to affect us.
I used to take every disappointment as a major loss, a personal statement about the future of dreams.
Now I have learned that life will be filled with every shade of feelings, every texture of emotions, and that there's beauty in that as long as I honor myself truthfully in every moment...


I am strong because I've been weak
I am fearless because I've been afraid
I am wise because I've been foolish.

Trusting people is becoming hard
Keeping my grades up is becoming hard
Feeling happy is becoming hard
Thinking happy thoughts is becoming hard
Doing work is becoming hard
Maintaining a friendship is becoming hard
Doing everything  is becoming hard and I dont like it..


Here I am staring your perfection..
And now on Im going the direction with you even Im still at your back.

Tuesday 11 March 2014

Happy..Sad and Tired. :E



Capture the moment Cause even forever ain't forever.

THE BEST MEMORIES..
who still remember?
All change.....
Wish that can travel back through time..
Go back to the best memories..
When we're just little kids and do something insane like throwing teacher's canes to the roof..
throwing the jelly to the fan..and a lot..

Nowadays,we're like strangers..awkward..
everybody busy with their own things..
Who still miss those memories...? 



那些回忆就如留在电脑那些年的照片忽然要被format过一样吗
在学校看到你们我心情是如此高兴 可是我连上前一步打招呼的勇气都没有。
男生不是要比女生主动的吗
难道我们打招呼的方法只有用眼睛看来看去瞪来瞪去望来望去吗
虽然是比较特别而且带有6H班的fuuuu lak.. 可可是会不会……太无言了
下次6H聚会我要当最出色的那个我不可以再躲了


那些年只是一群三八婆死八公的我们,过了四年,全部变成帅哥美女什么意思
我也要努力lakkk
两年后我要变成有身材却矮小的女生 咳..高度是自己无法控制的问题...
自己得接受这个事实

PS:不小心在6H班的某一个桌子的抽屉找到巡察员带! ! ! ! 哈哈哈哈
怀念六年级当巡察员的时候... 啊... 那时候我不知道几想当巡察员呢LOL


-

昨天不小心让我找到五年前的好朋友是如此的高兴啊啊啊啊啊
自从我fb第一个的帐号出问题  开了新的一个账号 朋友全部都不见了
所以可以想象那种找到朋友的感觉 就像..隔天醒来就在disneyland 的 Fuu..
聊着聊着就变成我名副其实的大koko喇 咳咳..还是应该叫他小弟呢哈哈哈
因为他斯文人不适合当老大 粗鲁的妹妹我才适合maa 
十年后我真的很希望你能出席共和小学的100周年喇 :(
那时候你没有交通我就驾车载你去吧 毕竟老大照顾小弟这事是我的本分
哈哈哈哈 可是你真的没来 我说会去你房间放bomb是真的

另外我还找到整整十年前的朋友!! 如此兴奋啊啊啊 嘿嘿嘿
他就是我一年级的时候在班上出了名的懒惰鬼啊哈哈哈哈
他虽然忘了我的名字可是还记得我姓赵!! 哈哈哈哈很无言咯
可惜他也没有留着1k的照片怎么每个1k的同学都把照片弄不见了..
那可是回忆啊啊啊啊 回忆....可是我小时候也把它丢了 永远找不回了..


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谢谢老天爷那天让我出席星期六当天共和的90周年..
让我知道原来对你来说我只是一个填补你空虚时候的朋友而已..
当天你学校了打电话来问我在哪里 你知道我有多高兴吗
就算我再怎么着急怕你找不到我所以信息你 你不回我我都没关系
因为我以为你把我放第一所以才第一个打给我..
在学校,我们上课前或下课甚至放学 我们都会粘在一块 就算我们不同班
不开心的时候我们会一边说一边流泪 开心的时候一边笑一边打桌子
我们的第三个名字一样意见超一样性格超一样 会一起从早上逛街到晚上
可是...星期六当天为什么你一直在无视我? 我知道婉琪比我重要 因为你们从小玩到大的
也用不着无视我吧.. 这四年里 我们就好像姐妹一样了 难道那一刻就不能应一下我吗
JiaLing都四年没见没聊的朋友了 那时候你们就如我和你的感情一样 那四年的感情
明明我和你的感情胜过你和JiaLing的感情 可是在现实中我却比不上你们
连Vivian都看得出你无视我了 过后回家的路上了 你打来你问我在哪里回了是吗
我说是啊怎么了 你说没什么 我问婉琪和Jialing呢 你说回了……
你当我是什么? 她们回了你才来找我? 这是什么意思? 我也无所谓了....我累了


I'm just kinda tired, u know?
I want to stop trying and not care for a few days.
I'm little tired of feeling like a failure.
I wish I could make it all go away.. the feelings .. my depression..the anxiety.. All of it.
I just want to get away from it all.


I'm not even angry or upset any more, i'm just kind of numb...



我只是想说、不要利用我的愚蠢来帮你们解闷好吗?我真的累了..
:'(
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